Secular Pro-Life
  • Home
  • About
    • Meet The Team
    • Mission and Vision
    • Frequently Asked Questions
    • Stances
      • Abortion
      • Religion
      • Contraception
      • The Rape Exception
    • Privacy
  • Content
    • Index
    • Blog
    • Presentations
      • A Secular Case Against Abortion
      • Building Bridges
      • Deconstructing Three Pro-Choice Myths
      • Overlooked Findings of the Turnaway Study
    • Research
      • Abortion Law and Abortion Rates
      • Abortion Law and Pregnancy Rates
      • Later Abortion
      • Embryonic Hearts
      • Abortion Views and Gender
    • Collections
      • For the biology textbook tells me so
      • They can hear you
      • Parents can hear you
      • Our children’s heartbeats
      • Becoming Pro-Life
      • Ask An Atheist
      • Fixed that meme for you
    • Print Materials
      • 100 Pro-Life Sign Ideas
      • Overview Brochure
      • FAQ
      • Why Secular People Should Care
      • Tell People You’re Pro-Life
      • Bridges
      • Presentation Overview card
    • Store
  • Contact
  • Get Involved
    • Why support SPL?
    • Donor Opportunities
    • Volunteer Opportunities
    • Volunteer Survey
    • More Surveys
      • Why do you support SPL?
      • Best and Worst Abortion Arguments
      • “Ask An Atheist” Interview
      • Non-Traditional Pro-Life Survey
      • LGBT Pro-Life Survey
      • Parents experiences with prenatal screening
  • Donate
  • Menu Menu

Women say they grieve but don’t regret abortion. Is that a contradiction?

March 3, 2023/in Miscarriage & Pregnancy Loss, Uncategorized /by Monica Snyder

When discussing whether women regret abortion, I think people are using different meanings of the word “regret.” Some mean feeling remorse over an event or wishing it had gone differently. Others mean feeling sorrow or otherwise suffering. The ideas are similar but not identical.

The distinction is important when we discuss whether women regret their abortions. Which meaning of “regret” are we using? Some people specifically mean women wish they hadn’t gotten abortions, while others more generally mean women suffer because of their abortions. Again, maybe the ideas are correlated, but they aren’t identical.

At Secular Pro-Life we’ve been touching on these ideas when we post testimonials from Shout Your Abortion (SYA) of women essentially saying they are experiencing deep grief, but still insisting they do not regret their abortions. Here is one such story along with some of the comments others left underneath it:

Other examples here.

Our point in posting these stories is not necessarily to say these women are in denial. Some probably are, but others may be describing their emotional state (grief, not regret) as accurately as they can.

Grief and regret aren’t interchangeable. It’s possible to feel sorrow over an event but still believe it was for the best. And it’s possible to wish an event had gone differently without specifically feeling grief over it.

When the Turnaway Study and abortion activists claim virtually no women regret their abortions, I think they’re using “regret” to specifically mean “wish they hadn’t gotten abortions.” But even assuming their claims are true in that regard (and we are skeptical), those claims don’t negate the people saying women suffer from their abortions. Because you can both not regret and still suffer terribly, as many SYA testimonials suggest.

None of this is necessarily an argument for outlawing abortion. (Abortion should be illegal because it kills valuable human beings.) But it’s a separate (and still serious) problem if broad cultural messaging incorrectly tells women there are no significant mental, psychological, or emotional repercussions to abortion. It’s one thing to say “no one regrets it.” It’s another to imply “no one suffers for it.”

[Read more – Five years later, 96% of women denied abortion no longer wish they could have had one. (Turnaway Study)]

If you appreciate our work and would like to help, one of the most effective ways to do so is to become a monthly donor. You can also give a one time donation here or volunteer with us here.

Related Posts

Tags: SYA
Share this entry
  • Share on Facebook
  • Share on Twitter
  • Share on Pinterest
  • Share on LinkedIn
  • Share on Reddit
  • Share by Mail
https://i0.wp.com/secularprolife.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/i-wasnt-in-a-relationship-studying-never-planned-this_highlighted.jpg?fit=2048%2C2048&ssl=1 2048 2048 Monica Snyder https://secularprolife.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/SecularProlife2.png Monica Snyder2023-03-03 04:30:512025-02-23 11:17:15Women say they grieve but don’t regret abortion. Is that a contradiction?
You might also like
Destigmatized abortion increases the pressure to abort
How #ShoutYourAbortion Changed My Mind
8 reasons to talk about women who struggle after abortion
“We invited the child’s spirit to revisit Earth another time.”
“Aborting my baby.” Women describe their aborted embryos as their children.
“Did I make the right decision?”

Follow via Email

* indicates required

Categories

  • Ableism
  • Abortion pills
  • Administrative
  • Adoption & Foster Care
  • Biology
  • Bodily Rights
  • en español
  • Later Abortion
  • Legislation, laws, & court cases
  • Miscarriage & Pregnancy Loss
  • Personhood
  • Philosophy
  • Pro-Life Demographics
  • Rape Exception
  • Religion
  • Research
  • Speeches, Discussions, Presentations
  • SPL Emails
  • They Can Hear You
  • Top SPL Articles
  • Top SPL Graphics
  • Uncategorized
  • We Asked You Answered
  • Year In Review
  • Your Stories

Archive

It’s crucial that we demonstrate that anyone can–and everyone should–oppose abortion. Thanks to you, we are working to change minds, transform our culture, and protect our prenatal children. Every donation supports our ability to provide nonsectarian, nonpartisan arguments against abortion. Read more details here. Please donate today.

DONATE
SUBSCRIBE
© Copyright 2025 Secular Pro-Life. All rights reserved. Website Design by TandarichGroup

Related Posts

Florida Lawsuit Seeks Release of Pregnant Prisoner, Unborn Child Walgreens sign that reads "Boycott us, abortion drugs kill, #stopabortionrx" In 20 States, Walgreens Backs Down from Abortion Drug Distribution
Scroll to top
Want to receive our email newsletter?

We’d be happy to keep in touch. Subscribe for access to our newsletter and other updates.