Friday notes
The Thanksgiving holiday has passed, but there is still much to be thankful for. Here are a few more individuals who have written SPL with messages of thanks:
- Heather Crandall wishes to thank Shirley Joslin, the sidewalk counselor who saved the life of Heather’s son Judah. Heather also thanks the volunteers and staff of the Sarasota, FL maternity home where she stayed during her second pregnancy: daughter Ivory, born this past Valentine’s Day.
- Catherine Wettengel wishes to thank Anne Franczek for being a sidewalk counseling mentor.
- Susi O. Fannaba wishes to thank her mother for opening up to the family about a past abortion, and also thanks the various post-abortive siblings she has connected with in an online support group.
Changing the subject somewhat, today is Black Friday. I’ve never seen the appeal of camping outside a Wal-Mart at 4 in the morning, but I definitely see the appeal of $5 for your ticket to the Students for Life of America conference! Get that deal at sflalive.org using the discount code BLKFRIDAY, good through December 1.
And as you begin your holiday shopping, you can support Secular Pro-Life by checking out coupons on Goodshop; be sure to designate SPL as your charity.
You can also support a pro-life organization through Amazon Smile. SPL is not on Amazon Smile, but quite a few other groups are, including Feminists for Life of America, Students for Life of America, And Then There Were None (supporting former abortion workers in their transition out of the industry), Americans United for Life, National Right to Life Committee, and many state and local organizations.
The interesting thing for me about the three "prolife Thanksgiving" stories is that only one of them was about a woman who found herself in a position where she would be legally coerced to give birth – Valerie Lopez, suddenly discovering she was 23 weeks pregnant in Texas, was effectively forced-not-chose to give birth – discovering that with sufficient help from her own family, from her partner, and from her friends, having no choice but to give birth can still be a happy ending.
Which is great, obviously – at Thanksgiving, no one would want to hear from the thousands of women and girls who also had no choice but to give birth but who had no support from partner or family, no friends who could afford to provide enough support to make a difference, no choice but to lose their baby to the adoption industry or go bankrupt or struggle with massive debts and all the responsibilities and costs of bringing up a baby. I'm glad Valerie Lopez's unexpected pregnancy and coerced childbirth had a happy ending, but now it's no longer Thanksgiving, it's worth perhaps – not for prolifers obviously – giving a thought to girls and women less fortunate than her?
Crystal Kupper tells a prochoice story of abuse and recovery, and I salute her bravery. It would be interesting to know, if she cares to share that, whether she really does realise that trying to ensure that women in her position would be legally forced to give birth, not allowed to make the choice she did, is agonising anti-empathic: she chose, but she wants others to be forced against their will?
The third story, about Jewels Green being convinced that a woman being forced against her will to have a baby she does not want and cannot afford is somehow more "compassionate" than respecting her human right to make a choice: that letting girls die of pregnancy/childbirth is only what they deserve: that the deaths that prolife legislation causes whenever it is enforced is somehow "a consistent life
ethic" because "Life matters, no matter what" is not applicable to girls and women, only to a conceptus/embryo/fetus. I suppose it is a "prolife" story, but I'm unclear what Jewels feels she has to be "thankful" for that she swopped a belief in human rights for women for a belief in coerced pregnancy and childbirth.
By deduction, I suppose a "post-abortive sibling" is children born after their mother had an abortion, who rather than being happy their mother had only the children she chose to have, choose to make themselves wretched over the fact that before they were conceived, their mother decided not to have a baby.
My opinion of the loathely bullies who hang around outside healthcare clinics to abuse the women going in is unchanged.
Well said. I am that young woman who 'chose life' in 1962. I received no support and plenty of condemnation and abuse. It was one of the stupidest decisions of my lifetime.It was so painful for me to read about the 'happy ending' that I had to stop reading and could not comment from sheer pain.
Abortion was not legal at the time. I credit legal abortion for the change in social behavior that has induced support for pregnant woman and not social torture we received in the past.
Since I don't believe I've had a chance to say it on this blog, a happy belated Thanksgiving to anyone who happens to be reading this.
Don't be sorry. That daughter is 51 now. It was a long time ago. I do not regret that she exists. I still suffer from the effects of that decision. And I am 71.
Bringing up children alone is impossible. If you did it all, never mind well or ill, and the child is alive, healthy, working and not in jail, you are a hero.
You and I both, then. 🙂
Correct. God bless us.
Who gets abused on the way in and out of the abortion clinic is the human being who doesn't get to leave except in a hazmat barrel.
Thank you for all the hard work you did for your child. My daughter is doing it now. Even though she gets a lot of help and support its still hard. Sometimes she comes over and we will be talking and playing with the baby and I will look over and she is asleep where she sits. Even still Arianna is a joy that is irreplaceable. Life is ups and downs twists and turns a rollar coaster that you never know where it will go.
……..and we all deserve a chance to experience it.
Bringing up children alone is difficult. I ended up raising mine alone due to divorce. The other day I was thinking about how when children are involved in a breakup of some kind there is no happy endings, no silver linings, there is just survival. But then I realized even in survival there is happy endings and silver linings, just not the kind you were hoping for. Thank you for having your daughtereven though you feel the worse for wear. I know the feeling. I feel like rusty gold. Worth something but a bit rough and dinged up by life.
I had abortion too. I thank me for having that as well. I went on to have to two other daughters I raised alone. I have been a single parent for more than 50 years.
A fetus is not a human being. A human being does not have to suck my blood to survive. Nor is a human being entitled to suck my blood because you may get sad feelies if it cannot.
So you erase women completely?
Really, so when the prolife bullies are howling abuse at the women, the target of their abuse is actually any fetuses they may be pregnant with? I had no idea.
I thought the mobs were attacking the women, because it certainly always appears that way, but as night porter says, it seems the prolifers just don't even see the women – certainly not as human beings worthy of dignity, respect, and regard.
No one is getting abused in the abortion clinic. A woman is being saved from the misery and torture of an unwanted pregnancy.
Oh please. A trip down the birth canal does not a human being make.
Women don't kill their unborn children because they don't think they are human beings.
Agree.
Frederica Mathewes-Green:
"No woman wants an abortion as she wants an ice cream cone or a Porsche. She wants an abortion as an animal caught in a trap wants to gnaw off its own leg."
A woman may want to kill her husband or child desperately too.. doesn't mean she should be able to. She can GET HELP to deal with whatever issues she is having.
Does HELP include imprisoning suicidal 13 yo rape victims and force feeding them for 9 months until they give birth?
You would endorse that, right? Gitmo style torture of pregnant rape victims to save a fetus?
Help is a nice safe legal abortion for 40% of unexpected pregnancies.
Because no abortions ever are done to hide the results of an affair or for 15 minutes of fame… yea right. There is HELP out there. Even for rape victims.
Rebecca Kessling was conceived from rape. She is glad to be alive.
Abortion is never safe for the unborn child.
Cry me a river.
So…this is an admission that you support Gitmo style torture of pregnant pre-teen rape victims?
That's fucked up, Mathilde.
If a woman GETS HELP, there wont be any 'torture'. She can get help, make it through her pregnancy and either give the baby up or keep it. The closest thing to torture where abortion is concerned is the killing of the unborn child.
Nope. If she would rather starve herself to death than be forced to remain pregnant against her will, then Gitmo style force feeding is the ONLY option if pro lifers want to protect the precious fetus
And you support that, right?
She can get HELP from a counselor or medical professional. If a woman with an unwanted newborn felt that the torture of knowing her newborn was in foster care was just as bad as her keeping the kid and that made her suicidal, could she kill her kid? Is her life more important than her newborn's life?
No, she can't, and won't, not if the problem = unwanted pregnancy.
Way to dodge my questions…
No dodge. If a woman is determined to kill herself because she is prevented from safely aborting, she isn't exactly going to seek help is she, if the source of the problem is the unwanted pregnancy
Nope, Gitmo style imprisonment and force feeding is the only way to prevent a rape victim who is bent on suicide from actually doing it. …and you support that, don't you?
comparing an unborn child to a newborn is alot closer than comparing an unborn child to a rapist.
You dodged… If a woman is determined to kill herself because she doesn't want her baby and cannot bear the thought of her child being in foster care the only way to prevent her from killing herself is to let her kill her newborn… And, you support that, don't you?
Bu . . . but, they want the chance to love you along with their help. Why, how much more benign could something like that possibly be? All love and help are intrinsically in your best interest, aren't they? That's what I've been assured, and I know they'd never, ever lie. Would they?
The point is to end your own life because any more moments spent pregnant = torture.
You dodged…again…
By your 'logic', a woman could apply that 'end your own life' to parenting/adoption too.. they could use the "I can't deal with this, this is 'torture'" excuse to kill another human being – it's not right. Yes, their circumstances may be difficult, but they should not be used as an excuse to kill a human being that has done nothing wrong.
Abortion exists because the *only* way to escape is to evict the prenate from the body. The woman can escape her family by getting up and walking out and phoning 911 or adoption services.
The woman may not be able to 'escape' the mental strain of knowing her spawn is out in the world.. can she kill it so she won't have to bear the thought of her child EXISTING????? A pregnant woman can GET HELP too. Profession help to deal with the thought of wanting to 'escape'… Or help from pregnancy resource centers if her issues are financial or issues related to her thinking she won't be a good parent.
Nope.
Not the same. Born children do not live inside your body.
An unborn child is the same human being before birth as well as after birth – just in a different stage of development. Neither should be killed because someone doesn't CARE about them.
Then why do embryos not have functional brains, and may never develop a brain at all?
It's a LIFE CYCLE. Even at birth a newborns brain isn't fully developed. No reason to kill a newborn…. Odds are the newborns brain will continue to develop (if he or she isn't killed or doesn't die)
At birth an infant is a sentient individual. It is not at the embryo stage, and the embryo may *never* develop the capacity for sentience.
If not killed or miscarried there is a good chance an unborn child will develop a functioning brain. if there was a chance that great for a brain dead person (i.e. if not killed or died of something else) then we wouldn't be pulling the plug of brain dead people.
Potential =/= actual
Who said I was coming for your children? WE should have laws protecting children – born and unborn – from being killed though.
Not an excuse to kill.
Please elaborate. Make your case, through logic and reason. Please
Like I said, if there was a type of brain death where the doctor said there was a good chance that the patient would have a functioning brain again within 6 months (assuming no one killed the patient or he didn't die of another cause) then I'd bet my life savings that it wouldn't be legal for loved ones to pull the plug, possibly unless the patient left instructions on what his wishes were in that scenario.
Nope. Coma patients are often unhooked from life support even if there is a chance of recovery. Next of kin gets to decide. Same with extreme neonates.
Not if there was a chance at a full recovery….
"But if she had been aborted, she wouldn't know the difference."
Neither would someone who had been painlessly euthanized as an infant.
I disagree. An infant has a functioning cognitive brain and is conscious, unlike a fetus. Anything that has consciousness is going to "know the difference" so to speak, even if painlessly euthanized.
OK, I guess; however, such an infant will still obviously never know on what exactly he or she could have missed out on if he or she was not euthanized.
Nobody would know. But I said a fetus wouldn't know the difference. NOT that they would know what they are missing out on.