It’s normal to view our embryos as our prenatal children.

Some parents get tattoos to memorialize the children we’ve lost through miscarriage.

I’m reflecting this morning on how profoundly pregnancy loss can affect us. I’ve had two miscarriages, both around the 6 week mark, both deeply upsetting when they happened and, if I give myself time to think about it, deeply upsetting to this day.

I get being pro-choice out of concern for women and/or out of deeply held beliefs about bodily rights. I get that a lot of people don’t view early embryos as morally significant.

It’s harder for me to get why those people can’t seem to wrap their minds around the idea that many of us do — sincerely, cross my heart and hope to die — view early embryos as precious children. In the abortion debate, a lot of people speak as if the “embryo is a child” idea is, at best, peculiar and confusing, at worst, stupid or insane.

It is none of those things. It is normal and understandable to view our offspring as our prenatal children. And it’s normal and understandable to recognize that if my embryos are my prenatal children, yours are too.

[Read more: Our cultural gaslighting of women who miscarry before 20 weeks]